Hello,

It it good to see that Sharmi still has a positive spirit (referring to her earlier note). Even as her mom, it is sometimes hard to see what is going on inside her head and heart. I do believe that she is doing great and she is putting on a brave face, but today was a hard day for her. It should have been an easy day because we didn’t have our usual hospital visit and chemo, but she woke up at 1:15 AM last night. (Unfortunately for me since I didn’t get to bed until 12:30 AM). I brought her into bed with me and she was wakeful the rest of the night until she finally decided at 5:00 that it was time to get up. (Through my exhaustion I called Dean in tears and told him “I quit. I don’t know what or how but I quit.” It helped to at least pretend that I could stop the craziness that controls my every moment. )

Sharmalia was very fussy and clingy all day.  She didn’t seem to have the desire to play. She wanted me to hold her constantly. She also seemed frustrated that she wasn’t herself and she didn’t know what she wanted or what was wrong. This evening she was frantic over being “all done eating” and wanting to “try”. Nothing I did made her happy. Less than 5 minutes after the confusion in the kitchen Sharmi was laying on top of Foxy (our cat) and Foxy was trying to get way. I overheard Sharmi asking the cat, “Whats wrong with you? Whats wrong with you?”    It was only then that I realized I must have said that phrase to her. My intentions were truly one of trying to figure out what she wanted or if something was hurting, but I will rephrase it a little in the future.    It is scary when they start repeating you. Yesterday she was playing with one of her syringes for her meds and a glass of water. She dripped water on her tummy and said, “oh shoot.” These are cute, but my favorite right now is that she goes into my bathroom and closes the door (so that it is dark) folds her hands, closes her eyes and and prays “Dear Jesus…..” She even shakes her little hands for emphasis. I have had the privilege a few times to be in the bathroom when she has closed me in with her and said her heartfelt prayers.

Pam, a friend of ours was my saving grace today. She brought me dinner and said “I have an hour how can I help.” It was wonderful. She played with the baby while and I was able to get the dishes done and make some phone calls.

I want to thank all of you who have helped in so many ways. I can’t express our gratitude enough.  Some days the simplest tasks are impossible for me to do.  We have been so blessed by the food, the cards, the toys, and the prayers. Last night I covered up my daughter with a prayer blanket given to us by one of Dean’s co-workers and my heart welled up with gratitude and peace for all of the prayers that are covering our precious little girl. We are eternally grateful. God bless you all.

Cheris

hi there!
i’m doing pretty good still, and i’m so glad! i think phase 2 is much better than phase 1 and am happy to report i’m still getting stronger ever day with my walking. i have been a bit more tired and am sleeping in longer than i used to. i used to get up 5:45 and 6am, but lately i’ve been staying in bed until 7:30 or 8am.
did i tell you how much fun it is to live next to a park? we have swings and slides and i love to go over and play as often as i can. i especially love to slide down the slide! it’s so much fun!
i had a good time at sabbath school and church last sabbath, it was really good to see everyone and pick up the lambs offering like i used to do. i love sabbath school and singing “sabbath is a happy day” because it really is a happy day for me. not only do i get to see my friends from church, daddy is always home and i love it when we’re all together! i get really sad when i know daddy has to leave after sunday. but mommy says we’re moving soon and will live with daddy again. i sure hope our new house has a slide!
i’m excited too! we’re having company for a while. mommy and daddy’s best man and maid of honor from the wedding a LONG time ago are coming tonight and they’re bringing friends for me to play with! i really am looking forward to that!
well, i’d better go, i think i hear mommy calling me. bye!
*waves*

Hello Friends and Family,

The Curry’s had a very nice weekend. It has been wonderful to be able to take Sharmi to church again. One of her favorite songs is “Sabbath is a Happy Day.” We always ask her if she wants to go to church or not and she is always excited about going. This week during church she kept going back and forth between us and baby Elora. Sharma kept saying “take Elora” and off she would go to share her toys. This was really great to see since she has been struggling with insecurities. Friday night I had attended a medical lecture on Cancer and even though I took her and Patty alone to watch her (Sharmi could always see me though the windows), she was still very clingy that night. My independent little girl who we used to feel lucky when we got a hug, slept with her arms wrapped around my neck or crawled up on top of me with repeated plea’s of “need you” (which melts or breaks my heart every time she says it). When she woke up she was determined to hold both Daddy’s and Mommy’s hands as if to keep anyone from ever leaving her again.

Saturday afternoon we spent a few hours at Del Mar Beach with the church group. Sharmi loved the doggies. Every time one walked by she said, “touch doggie.” She also enjoyed walking barefoot in the sand and throwing rocks into the waves. She waits for a “big one” before she will throw it. It seems as if her primary goal was to wait long enough to get daddy’s shoes wet (she practiced this tactic on grandma and grandpa last week before they went home.)

We missed grandma on Mother’s day. But we are incredibly grateful for the amount of time that both grandma and papa have spent with us over the last several months. Between my illness in February and Sharmi’s diagnosis the first of March, my mother has spent more time at my house then hers this year. Mom has been quit the cinderella. She has taken care of both Sharmi and me. She has cooked, cleaned, bathed, read books, researched medical care and supplements, gone to tons of appointments and did all of the little things to keep our lives going. Dad has also been wonderful. He has painted, gardened, cleaned cars, read books, played and fed Sharmi (which was a lot when she was on steroids.)

We are very grateful for how well Sharmi is doing and I am trying to ignore the huge “to do” list enough to play with her while she is feeling good.

Hello, (Sorry for the old news. This somehow didn’t get posted last week when I typed it)

Sharmi and I are a little lonely today. Her grandma and papa flew home yesterday afternoon. It was sad that we didn’t even get to take them to the airport. Sharmi loves the planes. However, she had another Chemo therapy treatment yesterday and so we were stuck at the hospital. Luckily our very good friend John Anderson came down to the hospital and took them to the airport.

The ride home was a very hard one for Sharmi. She has had grandma sitting next to her playing with her, reading to her, feeding her and holding her hand for the past two months. She kept say “grandma papa gone, plane.” And she kept expressing her need for love and comfort by saying, “Mommy, need you, all done driving.” Finally the best that I could do was to reach my arm over the back of the seat and hold her hand.

Her nanny (Ellen) has been here most of the day, so this has helped with some to the loneliness. However, she has been very clingy to mom and afraid that I might leave next. This poor little girl. I can’t imagine the insecurity she is feeling. We are worried about her move to a new house, new hospital and new doctors next month, and we would certainly appreciate your prayers for this also.

Aside from the fears, Sharmi is doing great. She did wonderful yesterday and barely cried when they put the needle in her chest to access the port. She is becoming one tough little girl! However, she did have a little problem with the anesthesia. When they gave her the anesthesia, to put her to sleep, tears got caught in her throat and she coughed and coughed. They had to suction out her throat to clear it (not something a mother likes to see).

The great news is that her immunity (ANC) was at 4300 yesterday. This is wonderful. (Normal is between 1500 and 5500) Her blood is doing so well that we don’t even have to go back next week. It will be nice to have a week off.

Cheris

hi there! guess what?! i had a birthday last week and i turned 2! mommy and daddy had a party for me today, and it was so much fun! we had balloons, and winnie-the-pooh decorations and my favorite–chocolate cake! daddy grilled some burgers and hot dogs (veggie of course!), we had salsa and chips…i found out i really like doritos nacho chips! i like to lick the flavor right off the chip everybody sang “happy birthday” to me, and i really liked that part–so much, that we sang it several more times before i went to bed and that was fun! i opened a lot of presents and i got lots of books and puzzles–i love puzzles. there were other toys and games and i just loved all of my gifts that were given to me–thank you everyone! it was my best birthday ever

i’ll bet you thought my mommy was going to take over writing for me since i’ve been so busy–but NO, i want to keep writing too, just now mommy is helping to tell you the grown-up stuff…and speaking of mommy, she’s getting a big tummy where my sister is growing inside her and we’re all so excited about that too! i hope mommy and daddy ask me what we should name my sister, i might have a lot of good ideas for names.

well, we’ve been very busy. i’ve been able to walk again and it’s so nice to go where i want to go and get there by myself if i want to. it still is hard for me to do, and i get tired more easily and sometimes i get medicine because my legs hurt. but i’ve started pushing my dolly stroller around again, and that’s so much fun! i go round and round the house. also, we’ve been going to the park next to my house every day, and i have so much fun going down the slide–that’s my favorite thing to do there

my medicine hasn’t been as bad this phase and they’re giving me other stuff to hopefully keep me from having trouble walking anymore. i’m still in physical therapy and that’s been going good too. i still don’t like going to have my procedure on wednesdays, and i hate going to sleep–i cry when they go to put the medicine in my port-a-cath. i know it’s going to be a long time before i’m better and it’s hard to remember my life before i got sick, but someday i’ll be all better again and that’s because Jesus and the doctors and my family are taking such good care of me. i see that a lot of you are praying for me and my family and i know it’s helping us, and that the ones bringing food are such a big help too. thank you all so much i’m going to keep being brave and try to enjoy each minute of fun i’m able to have!

well, i’d better get to bed, or mommy and daddy will catch me! nitey nite!

Hi,

Sharmalia’s day at the hospital went fairly well this week. She hasn’t had much of an appetite lately, so she did better then some days with fasting until noon. She of course asked for food frequently, (because she is such a determined little girl) but she didn’t go into hysterics when told “no”. She doesn’t understand why, but i do think she understands that it breaks my heart to not be able to give it to her, and in some way I think that calms her.

The procedure itself went well. She is making friends with the nurses, the nurse practitioners (the ladies who actually do the procedures) and she even liked this anesthesiologist.  However she still doesn’t like “going under”. She always cries when they reach for her port. She came out of the anesthesia like a champ as usual and she did fine with the IV.

Overall, she is doing much better this phase. In contrast to the last set of drugs which caused her to become lifeless (which was terrifying) her current drugs “wire” her. Especially in the evening she flies as high as a kite and it is difficult to get her to bed. For a few brief seconds last night grandma and I missed the lethargic days. Aside from our exhaustion we are incredibly grateful that she is doing so well.

We are looking forward to the weekend and we hope you all have a wonderful Sabbath.

Cheris

Hello Friends and Family,

As she stated in her last update, Sharmi has been very busy playing lately, so I am going to try to help keep everyone updated.

So far Sharmalia has been doing well with the new daily chemo drugs.  I did however, switch the time of day that I am giving it.  I was giving it to her in the evening and it seemed to be disrupting her sleep. She would wake up at least once an hour and cry out in discomfort, pain or fear. This of course makes me very tired also, as she has not gone back into her own bed since this all began.  (She has learned that having cancer has been her ticket to get away with most anything.) It is yet to be determined whether this helps or not, but I am praying that it does.

Saturday she began walking on her own again.  It began with just a few steps but now she can get around the main floor of the house pretty well. However, she tires quickly and wants to hold mommy or grandma’s hand.  As she already told you, she picked up the lamb’s offering at church on Sabbath with the support of daddy.  I of course cried tears of joy to see her walking again.  She did really great, but by the end she couldn’t take the one last step to put the money in the church. She collapsed into daddy and he had to help her finish.

Yesterday was her Birthday. Dean spent most of the day with us before flying back to Seattle. We spent many hours at the Zoo naming all of the animals. We saw our first wombat in real life. She has seen them on her videos’ so when I asked them what they were she shouted out “wombat.” I of course was impressed. I personally was amazed at how huge they are! They look much smaller on “Baby Einstein.” She had a great time, but it was her first real play day since this began, and she was exhausted. She feel asleep before her “birthday ice cream cone” and she didn’t wake up until four hours later. (Her longest nap of her life!)

Today we took her to physical therapy and Tammy the therapist was very pleased with her progress.  We have been concerned that her poor mechanics (walking on heals, hyper extending her knees & and poor balance) might be long term problems, but the therapist believes that they are due to lack of strength. We are very grateful to hear that.

Tomorrow is procedure day again. We all hate these days. I am sick to my stomach a day in advance every time just thinking about having to put Sharmi through it again. She hates not being able to eat. It is impossible to explain it to a 2 year old why she can’t have “Crackers” (crackers are her favorite) or any other food. Tomorrow she will be receiving the Chemo in her spine, they will check her blood levels and I believe that she will also get an IV drip to help deal with the side effects.

I can’t express how grateful Dean and I are for all of you and all of the support and prayers that we have received from you during this painful journey. We feel so blessed to have your love and the power of your prayers. Thank you.

Cheris