Update – June 5, 2007 (phase 3, day 14)
Sigh! There are those days when we feel like God is with us and then there are those days that we wonder. Yesterday was one of those wondering days. We took Sharmi to her appointment in the morning and then my mom and I needed to run a few errands. Before we got home Dean called and told us that we needed to go back to the hospital because Sharmi’s x-rays came back and her tibia was broken. With a heavy heart I turned around and headed back to the hospital. I can’t explain the sickening feeling that was going through my body as Sharmi, tired from the long day was saying, “Go Home mommy. Go Home.” There was nothing that I wanted to do more, but with tears running down my face I drove back to the hospital. Two and a half hours later we left the hospital with a hot pink cast up to her knee.
She is so brave when they put the cast on, but she cried softly with a broken heart knowing that something-else was happening to her that wasn’t right, and she couldn’t stop. It doesn’t matter how many times she says, “all done,” people keep doing things to her.
It doesn’t make sense from a mothers perspective. Dean and I have both had experiences lately where God has protected us, so why does she have to get knocked down again. She doesn’t deserve it. I just hope that something good comes out of this fracture and that maybe she will be able to get oxygen treatment or a lighter drug regimen because of it. God says that he can bring good out of everything, so I am watching for it.
Her blood counts were low yesterday also. She is not high risk yet but her immunity is below normal. She will be exposed to a lot of germs in the next few days with the packers and loaders being here tomorrow through Friday, and then being on a plane on Saturday. Keep her in your prayers please that she will handle the move well and that she won’t get sick. We have been telling her that all of our stuff, including her toys, are going to be packed up in boxes and taken to the new house that daddy bought for us, but I am sure it will still be traumatic to see strangers take her things away.
At this moment she is playing happily in the other room with Grandma. It is good to hear her happy chatter. We haven’t had too much of that these last few days. We treasure the moments that she finds joy.
As I stated earlier, we will be moving this week and so I don’t know when I will have access to a computer again. I will try to keep you posted.
Love to you all,
Cheris
Ugh, Im so sorry to hear that
Poor precious Sharmi! One day bad ole Satan won’t have any part of our world and all these yucky things will go away! We love you so very much! *hugs*
Comment by Rick Baskett — June 5, 2007 @ 8:51 pm
Hello Dean and Cheris,
From time to time I check your site and I am sorry about Sharmalia’s tibia.
I think its normal to ask all kinds of questions when this sort of thing happens. I have also found myself asking “Why me?” and saying “She doesn’t deserve this.” with respect to my own wife’s fight with leukemia.
I think that it is a mistake to pray for protection or whatever else and be disappointed when you don’t get the desired result. Of course it is easy for me to say this, putting it into practice is something else all together.
I don’t think my wife’s illness is something God caused and I don’t believe it is part of any larger plan either. Truth is – there is just an amazing amount about this whole process that none of us know for certain. Dr’s and everyone else work within various loosely defined spheres of uncertainty as they navigate through treatments too.
I think faith can give us the mental strength to do our very best against cancer or whatever other challenge. Finding the strength to deal effectively with something that threatens the life of your loved one seems like a miracle to me.
So I am encouraging your to renew your commitment to your faith and use it to strengthen your own spirit toward helping Sharmalia and yourself to get through this day by day.
Day by day? Sound a little bit trite? I think it is one of the most important points to remember. Sometimes I think the most obvious and well worn ideas are really the most important – and it is easy to forget and lose focus on that.
Just remember there will be bad days and good days – most setbacks are temporary!
Take care,
Chris
Comment by Chris — June 5, 2007 @ 11:55 pm