Hello Everyone,

I had great intentions of writing this weekend and sharing a great story where God sent an angel in the form of a stranger to me and to also share some cute antidotes of Sharmi.  However, (warning: more personal information that I am sure some of you would prefer I didn’t share,) I started getting mastitis the end of last week with fever and weakness and I also have had excruciating abdominal pain for the last couple of days.  The doctor said it was probably due to the uterus dropping and the organs moving back into place.  I certainly didn’t have this level of pain with Sharmi.  Yesterday I barely moved.  I couldn’t sit down, stand up or shuffle from one place to another without help.  I am doing much better today.  My poor mom.  She was going to go home the end of last week for a few days to do some of her own work until I got a fever from the infection.   She has been a life saver, but we are wearing her out.  Please keep her and her teaching in your prayers.  She is starting her music students a month late in order to be here for me during this time.  It is a loving, but great sacrifice. 

I will try to share the uplifting stories and antidotes later this week.

We have really been enjoying the last few weeks without Chemo, but tomorrow is the beginning of the next two years of the Maintenance Phase.  From reading the protocol tonight it looks like she might end treatement as early as May of 2009, but I will have to confirm this with the doctors.  I was pleased to read this, because we had thought it was two years from now.  Tomorrow she begins another 5 days of steroids (I think you all know how much I hate the steroids by now).  She also gets a chemo push in her heart (Vincristine), chemo in her back (Methotrexate) and she starts an oral chemo (6-MP) which it looks like she will be taking every day for the next “2 years.”  All of these drugs are ones that she has had before so there shouldn’t be any surprises with reactions.

Sharmi had quite the attitude tonight and after we finally got her to bed my mom said that she was acting like she knew her chemo started again tomorrow.  I have not specifically told her yet, but we have told enough people over the phone and at church etc. that I wouldn’t be surprised if she does know that it all changes again tomorrow.  I will tell her in the morning but I didn’t want her to have nightmares about it before she has to.  She is too bright for my energy sometimes.   Several weeks ago I was talking about her needing a n-a-p and she said “No n-a-p, I am not tired.” 

I wish I could just say “no more c-h-e-m-o” and make it all stop.  When you have kids you think that you will be allowed to make decisions for your children.  It is sickening to not have any choices.  Most of you know that I don’t really believe in Chemo and I strongly believe that God would have a different way of treating cancer, but in this society this is the way we have to do it.  However, since we don’t have a choice about putting our baby through this regime, I am very grateful that her prognosis is so good.  If we were faced with a cancer with significantly lower odds, I think we would go on vacation to Mexico and never come back.  There are so many doctors and clinics out there that heal cancer in more gentle and natural ways.  I have a lot of questions for God.  It is a good thing that we have an eternity with him.  In addition to the questions, I also a lot to thank him for.  I have two incredible little girls that I love with all of my heart and I am understanding Gods love better through them.  We can never comprehend what he did for us on that cross, but I do feel it a little bit deeper than I did before Sharmi got sick.  Not only would I take all of her drugs, all of her sickness, all of her needles and all of her pain, I would die for her!  Last week in church we were singing  “Like a rose, trampled on the ground, you took the fall and thought of me, above all.” As tears came to my eyes and a lump grew in my throat I understood a little bit more how much love God has for us.  We are so blessed to have such a loving God.

May God Bless you all.  Thank you for your prayers.

Cheris