Good Evening,

One of Sharmi’s phases right now is to use the word “hate” and we are trying to teach her to use different words.  But I have to say, I HATE chemo and steroids.  Last week was the hardest week she has had in a long time.  I think the combination of the chemo’s, the spinal, the bone marrow draw that hurt for 5 days in combination with her ANC counts already being low at 1700, she just had a miserable week.  Which means we all did.  Our saving grace was that our friend Carl was knocking down a bunch of trees in our back yard all week so it gave her something to watch.  She also enjoyed riding the excavator.  The only other thing she did was eat, watch movies, and whine a lot.  I am counting down the days until this is over!  What a great day that will be. 

Today has been great.  Sharmi has been such a good helper.  This morning after I put sister down for a nap I came out to find Sharmi folding the laundry.  She was doing an amazing job.  I have never asked her to help me fold.  She did it on her own initiative.  She was also great with her sister.  She tried to help Chantel wash her hands, they shared a pink sprinkle doughnut, they played dress up and they both ate their dinner in the bath tonight because Chantel was caught playing in the toilet.  I locked her out of one bathroom, so she went to my bathroom and played with a bottle in the toilet while I was on the phone.  So I dumped both of them in the bath and I fed them their dinner while they played in order to save time.  I am ashamed to admit that I am raising them to be like me.  I do not sit down to eat except for dinner everyday.  I eat and multi-task.  My poor kids.  The good thing is that tonight they thought it was funny. 

Chantel is getting a good sense of humor.  It is common for us to race with the girls when it is PJ time.  Dean gets Sharmi in her PJ’s and I get Chantel in her PJ’s.  Sharmi has been known to hide or run off with Chantels PJ’s so that they can win.  Well, last night Sharmi was going potty and Chantel grabbed her PJ’s and took off running.  She had the biggest smile on her face.  When Sharmi caught up with her, three rooms away,(tipped off by mom) Chantel was laughing so hard. Sharmi was also laughing and enjoying the humor and joking from her sister.  It was so fun to watch.

Dean told me a cute story about Sharmi.  The other day he took her to Costco and when they got to the car she realized that she had dropped her binkie at the express check-out.  Unfortunately, this is something that she still can’t live without so they went back in to look.  They looked for a long time and asked several people.  An employee said that if they found it they would throw it away.  But one customer waiting in line overheard the conversation between a daddy and a very sad little girl and she said, “I think I see it behind the monitor.”  She was right. There it was.  Sharmi was so excited and they went off to give it a good washing.  When they got out to the car Sharmi said to Dean, ” Daddy, I was so sad when we couldn’t find my binkie tears almost fell out of my eyes.”  When she got home she told me the whole story and she said,  “…another mommy found my binkie and put it up where it was safe so that I could find it.”

So there are some glimpses into our lives the last week.  Remember to enjoy the little things.  They are what matter in life.  Today for me it was pink sprinkle doughnuts and dinner in the bath tub.

Goodnight to you all,

Cheris

Good Evening,

Today marks the two year “anniversary” of when Sharmi was diagnosed with cancer.  She was admitted to the hospital on March 1st 2007, and we were given the official diagnosis on the 2nd.  It seems a weird anniversary to celebrate, but every year she is a survivor is a year worth celebrating. 

It is kind of ironic that two years after her diagnosis she had her last sedation and spinal chemo treatment.  I am more excited about this being over than Sharmi is.  This life is all she really remembers, so she is having a hard time adjusting to the thought of it ending.  Today after her sedation she was really cranky and had a melt down over washing her hands.  I explained that today was the last time that she had to go to sleep and get that medicine.  She cried, “But I want to do it again.  I like it.  The white medicine smells funny and it makes me feel wiggly.”  I have intentionally never explained the anesthesia process to her, so it was interesting hearing her describe and identify the effects of the anesthesia.  Once we got home we were talking about it again and she added, ” the white medicine makes my eyes spin,” and she laughed!  It melted my heart.  She can find things to enjoy even in the tough days.  

When her daddy was putting her to bed she said, “daddy, today was a good day.”  When he reminded her that she went to the hospital today she said, “I know, but the doctors take care of me, and I get a band-aid when they are done. “ 

What an incredible positive attitude.  In reality this day was harder than usual.  In addition to the two chemos they also drew a bone marrow from her right pelvis.  Once we got home she was really mellow and just watched TV.  She complained consistently that her back and her port access sites were hurting which is not usual.  For dinner, she would not sit on her chair because she said she was hurting too much.  So Dean held her on his lap, but then she started crying in pain about her left shin.  “Medicine, medicine I need medicine…my leg hurts… I need more medicine.”  The codeine seems to have helped with the pain, but I am amazed.  After a day like today she still says, “Daddy, today was a good day.” 

I have to agree with her.  It was a good day.  It was simply mommy and daddy at the hospital loving and caring for Sharmi.

I hope you can say that your day was a good day.

Cheris

Good evening,

I spoke too soon a few weeks ago when I said that the girls were finally healthy.  They were only healthy for about a week.  Since then they have had a cold for the last two weeks.  Poor Chantel is having the hardest time.  Monday and Tuesday she was hardly eating and what she did eat came back up.  Today she had a really bad cough.  However, I am hopeful that she is on the mend.  She ate a little at dinner tonight and she was actually smiling again.  I think that all of the antibiotics she took for her staff infection has really weakend her.  Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be a mother of healthy children.

Sharmi is doing pretty good except for her cold.  MONDAY WILL BE HER LAST SPINAL CHEMO IN HER BACK!!!!!   I pray that it will be the last time ever that I hold her in my arms and watch her colapse knowing that her back will hurt and she will wake up sick and weak.  I know she will take it like a champ.  I can’t help but think back to when this all began and how scary it was for her and us.  Now it is just another day.  She is my hero!

Sharmi has become such a big girl.  She loves to “mommy” Chantel.  This afternoon she was taking care of me.  I have had several rough nights of sleep so I laid down this afternoon to take a nap.  She had taken a short nap earlier so I asked her if she wanted to take a nap with me.  I was surprised when she said yes.  However, I quickly realized that she was ”putting me down for a nap.”  She crawled up into my bed and she read me two bible stories.  The first one was about baby Moses, with a little bit of baby Jesus slipped in and the second story was about Captian Naaman’s leprosy.  She did a great job.  When she was done reading she gave me cuddles for a while and then a hug and a kiss.  Then off she went.  She assured me that she would come back and check on me in ten minutes.  This would have been great, but she kept coming in to close the binds, tell me to hold still and go to sleep    (which I was desperatly trying to do)  and she even brought me my goblet of water and told me that she would get me more if I drank it all.  It was priceless!

Chantel’s newest thing is her infatuation with taking baths.  Every-time I turn around she is in the bath.  She can climb in now, but she can’t quite get out.  Her favorite bath is mine because she likes to stand under the facet and fill containers with water.  Yesterday, however, she climbed in her bath tub and she wanted me to turn the water on.  I turned it on until there was just a trickle and she drank it like our cat Bali.  It was really funny.  I caught it on video so she can laugh some day as well.

Good Bless you and your families.  Goodnight,

Cheris

Happy Valentines, (post finished on Tuesday the 17th)

Sharmi is having a really good nap today(Saturday).  It is 5:00 and she is still sleeping.  I think she has been sleeping for about two hours.  She hasn’t been sleeping well for the last couple of weeks so this is really good for her. 

Two weeks ago Sharmi was on her steroids again.  She did really well compared to most weeks in the past.  I wish I had figured it out 18 months ago.  Insead of managing her side effects with codine like the doctor recomended I kept her on chamomile during the day for her nerves and benadryl day and night for the itching.  We were also able to prevent her from getting constipated from the vincrinstine which usually is a three day problem which creates toxicity in her body.  She slept much better and didn’t get as worn out.  However, despite doing well on steroid week, she had a rough week after that.  I don’t know why, but she was cranky and I noticed that her skin color was very yellow some days.  She seems to be better again now.  

Chantel has had an eventful week.  I am learning that she is a sly little one.  Last Thursday morning everything had been quiet for too long so I began the search around the house.  Apparently Chantelhad found an orange marker and a small note pad.  She must have gotten bored with the note pad and decided that Sharmi’s door and wall were a much better canvas.  She knew that she was doing something wrong because she had closed Sharmi’s door so she could be creative in peace.   I worked very hard to remove the marker but it was hopeless.  The rest of the day when Chantel would see the wall she said, “Oh oh…  No no…. naauy naauy (naughty naughty).”   It was so cute.  I had a hard time not smiling every timeshe said it.  It almost made needing to paint the wall again worth it.   

Sharmi is also growing so big and getting so smart.  She amazes us on a regular basis.  Friday afternoon she went shopping with her Daddy at costco and she was holding the list.  She pointed to the last item on the list and asked, “Daddy does that word say ‘pizza’?”  She was right.  I asked him if he had read the list or mentioned that they needed pizza and he stated that he hadn’t said anything about pizza.  I think she learned it from one of her stories, but I have not taught her that word. 

As you know Sharmiis into books and reading.  She can “read” several small books all by herself now, word for word.  She has actually memorized the story and knows which words go with which page.  What is even more impressive is when she reads the story and she intentionally changes every page to be the opposite of what the book reads.  When she does it she laughs and thinks she is so clever.  Being mom, I ofcourse agree wholeheartedly. 

This weekend her friends Jennifer and Logan came to visit us again for a few days.  She had a wonderful time playing with them.  After they left on Monday I asked her if she had had a fun time and she said, “Yes, but I am sad they are gone.  I hope they will come back to play again soon.” It was a very nice valentine weekend for all of us.  John baby sat for us Saturday night so Dean and I could go out with some friends. 

I hope your Valentines weekend was  filled with love.  I send my love to you and your families,

Cheris

Hi everyone! I’ve been so busy playing with Sissy now that she’s big enough that I haven’t written anything in a long time! We are having so much fun together

We are coming back to California for another visit–this time to celebrate the end of my treatments! That means I won’t have to get medicine anymore, and I’m really excited about that

Please come to my party to celebrate! You have to click on the link for the party information and make sure you tell us whether you’re coming or not on the invitation, so Mommy can keep track since she’s gonna have dinner for us!

I can’t wait to see you all!!!

Love, Sharmi

Good Evening,

Today was another hospital day.  Sharmi did absolutely wonderful.  She has gotten so brave.  It was just another day out for her.  I was really tired this morning and didn’t think I was safe on the road so Carl drove us down.  I have always had a hard time driving home after her appointments.  I get so sleepy that I have dozed off on the drive home many times.  This morning I was struggling just to get to Trina’s house to drop off Chantel.  It was definitely a life saver to not have to drive, and Sharmi also really loved the extra attention and distraction.  And to top off her day, “uncle Carl” took Sharmi to her favorite restaurant in the world and bought her macaroni.  She would go to the doctors every day if she could go to Red Robin and get macaroni afterwards.

Sharmi’s blood counts today were good.  Too good actually.  Her ANC’s were 2400 so they have increased her weekly methotrexate chemo.  I am hopeful that the increase is small enough that is doesn’t affect her too much.  Tonight we started another series of steroids so it will be another tiring week. 

Grandma and Grandpa were here this weekend.  The girls had a wonderful time with them.  Chantel had a lot of funtickle time with grandpa and Sharmi hada great time with play-dooh with  grandma.  They made the ocean, the farm and the zoo and all of the animals in them.  

Sunday afternoon Sharmi was worn out and she was having a hard time.  (This is due to the fact that she was overtired because of missed naps and late nights since she has been too alert to sleep.)  Sunday Chantel wanted to go outside with Daddy and grandpa so she tried to put on her boots.  She was wearing her pajama’s still and asked grandpa for help saying, ”boo boo.”  Since she couldn’t get her boots on over her big pj’s I helped her put Sharmi’s boots on.  A few minutes later Sharmi decided she wanted to go outside as well.  As she was getting her coat on she saw Chantel through the window her in boots.  She came running into the kitchen crying hysterically.  My mom was worried, but I knew what the issue was.  I took Sharmi back into her room and tried to calm her down and put different shoes on and she is still kept looking out the window and she cried in a pathetic voice, ”Look at Chantel, she is sooo cute,” and then she sobbed some more.  My mom and I had the hardest time trying not to laugh.  We were both laughing, but we were at least trying to partially control it when Sharmi was looking at us.  It must be tough to be an only child and then have a little sister come in and take over your mom, your crib, your toys, your cloths, and now your rain boots.  What a hard life.   

What a precious little girl.   I am please though that for every time Sharmi has a had time sharing she is also taking care of her sister; feeding her, helping her on the rocking horse, reading to her, and loving her.  I am praying that they grow up to be best friends. 

Goodnight to you all. 

Cheris

Good Evening,

Yeah, we are all finally healthy!  It has been a long three months.  I was talking to one of my girl friends in California tonight and I realized that one or both of my girls have been sick for three months.  However, we are all doing great now! I am really enjoying the pleasure of being with my girls, and with the help of Beverly Hall now I am getting enough of a break to feel good and like a person again. 

Sharmi is doing pretty good, but she has been tired the last couple of days.  She doesn’t have any specific reason drug wise, so I am just watching her closely and I keep checking for a fever.  Last night when I was putting her to bed she was complaining of being hot.  She pulled up her sleeves and was rubbing her arms.  I felt them and I told her that they didn’t feel warm.  She said “mommy, you can’t feel it because your hands are too big.  You need little hands like mine.”  It was really cute.  In addition to her feeling hot she was itching all over.  This is typical when she is on steroids but she shouldn’t be itching now.  She was also itching this morning.  (I can’t help but think, “please don’t let it be shingles again.”)

Chantel is becoming such a fun little girl.  She is not the calm mellow little girl that we originally thought.  She is very fiery and she is giving Sharmi some competition.  She is learning to fight for toys.  Today she was claiming her toys and saying, “mi, mi, mi.” 

What is really cute is when she copies her sister.  Today I was in the office and Sharmi came in helling excitedly “Mom, mom, mom….!”  She kept coming in to tell me how many inches things were that her and Nana Hall were measuring.  So a few moments later Chantel comes running down the hall, through the entry and into the office helling, “mum, mum, mum.”  We laughed and told her how cute she was and so she went back down the hall and did it all over again.  It was really precious.  One of the girls’ favorite things to do is chase each other around the house and roar, laugh and giggle.  There is nothing better then watching your children enjoy each other. 

Life is such a blessing when you can enjoy it together.

Cheris